Sunday, March 31, 2013
Hello blog
I've been depressed lately. It's hard for me to put that out there, but it's the truth. My whole life, I've always felt like I have a shadow over my shoulder, just sadness waiting to come in and fill the holes. It comes and goes and I've been lucky to control my depression with medication for most of my life. So recently I felt like things were going well and I stopped taking my meds for the first time in about twelve years. It turns out I need those pills. And it feels like such a weakness and such a let down. I want to be authentic, and I really was hoping that I could finally dig down and be real, un-chemically altered me. But it didn't work out, and I'm choking down those pills every day and wondering if I'm doing the right thing.
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Just read your guest post at "Kind Over Matter". Wonderful insight into the influence of teachers. I'm nearly 60 years old and I still have very strong memories of the teachers who influenced me. And you're correct, the most memorable moments were also the mundane, everyday moments.
ReplyDeleteCan't ignore the post here about depression. I double checked the link to make sure I was talking to the same person who wrote the guest post. One thing to remember, depression that is caused by a chemical imbalance is nothing to be ashamed of or aspire to conquer. It just is. Thankfully there are meds to balance the imbalance and allow us to live full lives!
katiedidit, Thank you so much for your words. I realized, too late, that this post wasn't the best introduction to my blog. I struggle with how to express the dichotomies of joy and sadness in my life, and I do appreciate the fact that meds allow me to get off the couch and write something... and I'm starting to feel like this truth is something that I can share with my students as well.
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